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Old 10th July 2005, 23:33     #1
Jenza
 
Not work safe Liz Shaw One Crazy NZ Idol Bitch

Stolen from SA For the full unabridged version go here

Summary:

- Crazy fucked up girl stalks Craccum forums and turns it into a MEMEME fest.
- Crazy fucked up girl does a porn shoot. Note she's fucking ugly.
- Crazy fucked up girl does NZ Idol and puts out the WORST/FUCKING HILLARIOUS performance ever.
- Newspaper finds out and writes an article about her and her porn and her political aspirations. Young Nats? Rofl we're screwed.
- Crazy fucked up girl gets interviewed on More FM
- Crazy fucked up girl thinks she's getting a US recording contract.

Now for the heelarious stuff:

Porn Shoot.

*** NOTE NWS. DO NOT VIEW IMMEDIATELY AFTER EATING DINNER ***
http://www.freepichosting.info/hpics...353liz2385.jpg

http://www.freepichosting.info/hpics...218liz3628.jpg

http://www.freepichosting.info/hpics...222liz4979.jpg

http://www.freepichosting.info/hpics...331liz5138.jpg

http://www.freepichosting.info/hpics...1397liz613.jpg

Crazy fucked up emails to the Craccum guy

Video of NZ Idol performance A++ WILL TRADE AGAIN Edit: Video is Crash and Burn

Interview on More FM Part 1

Interview Part 2

Delusional ramblings on idolblog


Hands down one of the most amusing things I've had the pleasure of watching/reading in a LONG LONG time.

EDIT: Links fixxed.
Edit 2: Added mirror of thread.

Last edited by Jenza : 10th July 2005 at 23:43.
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:36     #2
Trigger
Laserman
 
image links not worky
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:38     #3
Jenza
 
Fixed em.
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:40     #4
Moo Redux
 
which video is she on the nzidol archive?
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:42     #5
Jenza
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Moo Redux
which video is she on the nzidol archive?
Crash and Burn
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:43     #6
Trigger
Laserman
 
oh my god you need to put more warning on those pictures

*breathes in and out to resist getting sick*
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:45     #7
The Edge
 
Question

I never saw NZ Idol, but did she get placed anywhere near the top?
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:47     #8
Moo Redux
 
Quote:
Register a Something Awful Forums account for $9.95
what the fuck? Why would anyone pay for a forum?
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:48     #9
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
:(

Quote:
Originally posted by Jenza
Fixed em.
MY EYES! THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING!
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:51     #10
Trigger
Laserman
 
I just watched the NZ Idol performance

wow, worst EVER
mega-ultra-owned


thanks Jenza, this is sometihng special indeed
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:51     #11
Reformed_Quint
 
I'd still hit it.
3 reasons:
1) Future party story
2) Can say you've slept with a porn star
3) Cause i'm male :/
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:52     #12
Jenza
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Moo Redux
what the fuck? Why would anyone pay for a forum?
Best $9.95 US I ever spent
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:52     #13
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
And Quint demonstrates for all just how abysmally low his standards are.
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:53     #14
Jenza
 
Quote:
Yeah, I'm at Auckland with her too. I've had the displeasure of being caught behind her heading up the stairs out of the Human Sciences Building, her tiny skirt giving up the ghost as rolls of her lower buttocks unfurled out. There were about six or seven guys with me, and the collective shudder and simultaneous turning of heads had to be heard and seen to be believed.

That's not all! I was lucky enough to be in her politics class last semester. In the first few lectures in each course, a class representative is picked as a liaison between the class and the department for monthly meetings and the like. It's nothing glamorous, and someone will usually just volunteer nonchalantly. Our class wasn't huge (fourty-something?) so we only had two people raise their hands for it - one fairly ordinary guy, and, natch, Ms NZX. Our lecturer was a pretty laidback guy, and offered them the chance to simply share the position rather than go through the rigmarole of voting. The guy was fine with this. She, naturally, kicked up a fuss worthy of an 8-year old. She got to her feet, and banging her desk, declared:

"No, we HAVE to have an election! I mean, this IS politics! Come on, people! I demand that we give speeches and cast votes!"

Eyes rolled across the room, and the lecturer, who could have been spending his time teaching us rather than wading through this bullshit, let her take the floor. She proceeded to give a spiel about her notoriety from Craccum, how she would stop at nothing to get what she wanted, and how (this is the clincher) since she'd won a fairly substantial bar tab for the student pub as a prize for another gloriously fucking insipid letter, she would shout drinks to those who voted for her.

Facing such subtle bribery, her rival gave a resigned speech, acknowledging that he wasn't all that interested in the position, he didn't have much experience, and that, face it, he couldn't compete with the offer of free beer. The pair retired to the corridor outside, while the class cast their votes.

A minute later, the wretched woman strolls proudly back in to see her name being rubbed off the board (with barely concealed mirth) by our lecturer. The class, unanimously, voted for the other guy. I never saw her in that class again, but the expression of shock and horror on her face will stay with me a lifetime.

The porn thing upped her fame no end. I first saw a copy of the shoot at the flat of some Craccum people, threw it away in drunken horror, only to see it land in the middle of the room, open at the vag spread photo. Superstition? Coincedence? Or a sign of ancient and fucking hideous evil?

Moreover my friend actually went and talked to her in the quad after she related the tale of her porn career in Craccum. From the sound of what she told me about the conversation, the poor girl's pathological. She didn't do the shoot as some sort of female empowerment or self-esteem thing. She just did it for attention and to get talked about. That most of that talking is akin to what's already been said in this thread is irrelevant. She craves fame, and it's at once pathetic, hilarious and fucking horrifying. One of a kind.
Oh and the people who are offering her a record contract are wedding singers, sounds like a prank.

http://www.escape-e-discjockeys.com/
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:54     #15
Matt0r
 
Bambeast? brilliant!!!
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:56     #16
Stilgar
Rough Joker
 
Couldn't resist laughing at her tits.
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Old 10th July 2005, 23:59     #17
Reformed_Quint
 
Quote:
Originally posted by CCS
And Quint demonstrates for all just how abysmally low his standards are.
hahaha that too.

But really, she wasn't _that_ bad, she did have nasty tits tho.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:00     #18
Moo Redux
 
Does anyone else have the nzidol audition? I'm a nublet tard that can't get the nzidol page to work properly.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:02     #19
Stilgar
Rough Joker
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Moo Redux
Does anyone else have the nzidol audition? I'm a nublet tard that can't get the nzidol page to work properly.
You have to chose a connection speed before it will work.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:03     #20
The Edge
 
Some implants may help her "career" a bit, I'd say.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:05     #21
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Reformed_Quint
hahaha that too.

But really, she wasn't _that_ bad, she did have nasty tits tho.
No dude, she IS that bad. She's fucking awful and I had to go look at some good porn to cleanse my mind's eye.

Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you? How could you fuck that hambeast and not feel ashamed, disgusted and infected afterward?
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:06     #22
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
Quote:
Originally posted by The Edge
Some implants may help her "career" a bit, I'd say.
And liposuction and rhinoplasty.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:07     #23
Moo Redux
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Stilgar
You have to chose a connection speed before it will work.
Yes I choose the connection speed and the little windows media applet comes up, but it just sits there...

gutted
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:09     #24
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
The only other way I can think of doing it is to open this url

http://images.tvnz.co.nz/flashvideo/...30705_128k.asx

in windows media player.


I'm not l33t nerd, so there may be a more elegant solution.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:12     #25
[email protected]
 
Big Smile

fark..no way im opening them at work..
think i'll wait till I get home..
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:12     #26
The Edge
 
God that singing was terrible. Her reaction to failing reminded me of the attitude my sister has sometimes...
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:16     #27
Jenza
 
http://www.idolblog.com/sunday-news-liz-shaw for the Sunday News coverage.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:21     #28
The Edge
 
I hate to ask an obvious question here, but why are we picking on this said female? Has she done something to you there, Jenza?
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:23     #29
Jenza
 
Ah ha.

Reread the first line of my post k?
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:23     #30
Matt0r
 
Devil grin

since when is a reason required for picking on people?
this is NZGAMES after all!
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:29     #31
mcbeef
 
Damn she would have to be the worst combination of low iq and mental illness combined i have seen in a long time .

I pity anyone who has to deal with her and can understand why those who have had the misfortune would want to warn others .
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:31     #32
Stilgar
Rough Joker
 
'CraAAAaaAash and BuuUUrrrn'
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:33     #33
The Edge
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Jenza
http://www.idolblog.com/sunday-news-liz-shaw for the Sunday News coverage.
Man that thread goes on and on and on...
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:39     #34
Shock
 
Its so awesome that the goons at something awful think she needs locking up aswell as us.
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Old 11th July 2005, 00:59     #35
?>Superman
 
Because we never thought we'd encounter a more annoying and dumber bitch Cookie.

This could be a challenger.
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Old 11th July 2005, 01:24     #36
Omicron
 
People like her sense attention. They feed on it.

She'll be here soon enough... What have you done?!!
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Old 11th July 2005, 01:31     #37
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
Cunning

Quote:
Originally posted by Omicron
She'll be here soon enough...
The sooner the better
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Old 11th July 2005, 01:51     #38
Mish
User Awaiting Email Confirmation
 
Devil grin Oh God, The irony...

IT BURNS!
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Old 11th July 2005, 02:11     #39
xin
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Moo Redux
what the fuck? Why would anyone pay for a forum?
Its a marvelous thing. Keeps the idiots, kiddies, spammers, trolls, hambeasts, gnomes, dwarves, goats out and the funny in. Get banned? pay another :10bux:
That and 60,000 members chews through alot of traffic. 20Gb of Plaintext html a day.
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Old 11th July 2005, 02:18     #40
Markh
 
Sad

Get yer tits out!!!!

Oh god, put them away, put them away!!!!!!!

They are the worst tits I have ever seen on any girl that has posed for porn.

And her minge looks pretty horrible too.
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