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Old 26th October 2011, 19:53     #1
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
(spun off from the RWC Final thread, getting distracting)

I'm old enough to remember the Battle of Nantes in 86. That was some fucking brutal shit.

Buck Shelford got punched in the face by some French cunt and had a bunch of teeth knocked out. Then some other French cunt went tapdancing on Buck's groin in rugby boots, ripping open his scrotum and leaving one of his nuts dangling out. So Buck got stretchered off and taken straight to hospital.

LIKE FUCK HE DID.

Buck walked to the sideline during play and got the team physio to stitch up his scrotum with a needle and thread while Buck held his testis in with his hands, gritting his gums against the pain because he'd just had his teeth knocked out. Once the work was done downstairs Buck had his mouth packed with bandages and he ran back out on to the field to continue play and smash some French motherfuckers in front of the 3 or 4 fans in attendance who hadn't fainted at what they'd just witnessed.

Later in the game some other French cunt punched/kneed (I forget) Buck in the head and knocked him out cold to stop him fucking their shit up.

French rugby at its finest. But its how Buck took it that people remember from that day.
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Old 27th October 2011, 14:42     #2
Savage
 
Wacked

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ab
I'm old enough to remember the Battle of Nantes in 86. That was some fucking brutal shit.

Buck Shelford got punched in the face by some French cunt and had a bunch of teeth knocked out. Then some other French cunt went tapdancing on Buck's groin in rugby boots, ripping open his scrotum and leaving one of his nuts dangling out. So Buck got stretchered off and taken straight to hospital.

LIKE FUCK HE DID.

Buck walked to the sideline during play and got the team physio to stitch up his scrotum with a needle and thread while Buck held his testis in with his hands, gritting his gums against the pain because he'd just had his teeth knocked out. Once the work was done downstairs Buck had his mouth packed with bandages and he ran back out on to the field to continue play and smash some French motherfuckers in front of the 3 or 4 fans in attendance who hadn't fainted at what they'd just witnessed.

Later in the game some other French cunt punched/kneed (I forget) Buck in the head and knocked him out cold to stop him fucking their shit up.

French rugby at its finest. But its how Buck took it that people remember from that day.
I've never heard that story before - that's insane D:
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Old 27th October 2011, 14:49     #3
Savage
 
Described brilliantly here: http://www.badassoftheweek.com/shelford.html

Quote:
Originally Posted by article
Seriously, are you kidding me with this shit? Not only is this the most insane tale of on-field toughness ever recorded, but shortly after having a threaded needle repeatedly jammed into in an area where most guys aren't particularly keen on inserting pointy objects, this unstoppable Rugby-Bot 9000 came back and played the second half with a stitched-up junkbag and a mouthful of gauze to prevent him from coughing and spitting blood all over the place Alice Cooper-style.
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Old 27th October 2011, 15:52     #4
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage
I've never heard that story before - that's insane D:
Now you know why old bastards like me regard Buck as some sort of superhero come to life. I mean, Buck was the guy who made the All Blacks haka what it is today. When Buck lost the captaincy and selection for the ABs it was life-changing. If there's a world where Buck isn't wearing the No. 8 black jersey I don't want to be part of it, that sort of thing*.

Thus arose a quasi-mystical Arthurian desire for Buck to return and make everything all better whenever anything goes wrong. When Dusautoir scored that try against the ABs in the RWC final, you can bet somewhere there were Kiwis shouting "BRING BACK BUCK" at the television.

* Buck's replacement was some mulleted kid from Auckland named Zinzan, who fortunately turned out to be ok at rugby.
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Old 27th October 2011, 16:07     #5
Furry Crew
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage
I've never heard that story before - that's insane D:

Wow....I'm seriously surprised you've never heard that story before. That's like one the biggest legend of NZ rugby. Only difference is that it actually happen and it was captured on film.

What a hard fucker.....every time I see a Soccer pussy go down on a dive I think of old Buck and I just get mad.
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Old 27th October 2011, 16:10     #6
Savage
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ab
"BRING BACK BUCK"
I was still a snot nosed brat chasing monkeys off our roof in South Africa in the late '80's, hence my ignorance. I've heard the above phrase a few times throughout my stay in NZ, but didn't know the source or reason behind it.

It makes a lot more sense now
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Old 27th October 2011, 16:31     #7
Furry Crew
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage
I was still a snot nosed brat chasing monkeys off our roof in South Africa in the late '80's, hence my ignorance. I've heard the above phrase a few times throughout my stay in NZ, but didn't know the source or reason behind it.

It makes a lot more sense now

You're forgiven then....consider yourself now duly informed :-)
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Old 27th October 2011, 16:34     #8
blynk
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ab
* Buck's replacement was some mulleted kid from Auckland named Zinzan, who fortunately turned out to be ok at rugby.
It's interesting looking back at things like this now.
Just like Kronfeld was suprisingly dropped. For McCaw.
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Old 27th October 2011, 16:35     #9
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 


All Whites vs Paraguay, 2010.



onstage at Crowded House gig, 2010.



ABs-Wales 2005



cricket, Wellington, 2011



ABs-Scotland, 2007


etc etc etc.
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Old 27th October 2011, 16:52     #10
Savage
 
Haha nice

There seems to be a strong general consensus that he added a lot to the Haka as well. Once I'm back home tonight I'll check out some of the vids around of him performing the Haka. I've seen some of the old school videos of the early- to mid-1900's ABs performing the Haka and must say, they don't seem to have anywhere near the aggression or challenge that the 1985+ AB's have shown (not to say they couldn't play rugby!).
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Old 27th October 2011, 16:56     #11
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
Quote:
Prior to 1985 the All Black haka was a sorry affair. The guys were a mixture of european (pakeha), māori and others. Most of the european players had no experience with the haka at all let alone any idea of what it represented, therefore, it was performed badly.

Players could be seen to be looking at each other to see what the moves were. They wouldn't be in time and the moves had no meaning or purpose. The players were doing their best though and people still loved it.

When Wayne was approached by a player about doing the haka before a game in Argentina he passed it onto Hika Reid - another Rotorua player - who also wasn't keen because, "… the Pakeha, they don't know what they're bl…y doing."

They talked further and when more players said they wanted to do it Wayne said to them, "If we're going to do it, we're going to do it right… perform the haka properly or not at all. Vote on it…"


All the All Blacks bar one voted to do it properly and once they got into it, they got into it. Big time. They went into training - for the haka.

Hika and Wayne taught them what it was all about and the guys began to get a sense of pride in doing it well. It helped that it is a huge psychological booster for going into a game, it would pump them up like nothing else, not to mention intimidating the opposition.

Wayne laughs when talking about teaching some of the European (Pakeha) members of the team. About how they couldn't get some of the movements and they would do a women's movement instead of a man's. And how their timing sucked.

Once the team had the haka up to a high standard it made for electric viewing. New Zealanders were sold. I love this description from Mike King, a well-known New Zealand comedian, "They took it from a whole lot of white guys dancing at a disco and turned it into what it should be…"

And this from Willie Jackson - broadcaster and political commentator, "And then all of a sudden, this Buck Shelford came along and introduced rugby to Mana Māori. He changed it overnight. He captured not just Māori, but the country's imagination."
http://www.rotorua-travel-secrets.co...acks-haka.html

Quote:
He took over from David Kirk as captain for the tour of Japan in October and November and played in each of the five matches. Upon becoming captain, Buck brought his teammates to Te Aute College, a Māori school, to see the students perform a traditional haka. Although the All Blacks had been performing the haka at the start of their matches since the team's inception, it was Buck who taught them the proper way to perform the "Ka Mate," the haka they still use to this day at the start of their matches.
http://www.scoop.co.nz/stories/CU110...ck-is-back.htm
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Old 27th October 2011, 17:10     #12
Savage
 
Yep that's precisely what I'd read earlier
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Old 27th October 2011, 17:30     #13
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
Here's another one of the legends: at RWC1987 there was a bit of biff in the NZ-Wales semifinal. Buck flattened Welsh lock Huw Richards with a strong punch, right in front of the touch judge. Oh shit. The touch judge conferred with the ref, NZ held its breath, and the ref went to his pocket. And red-carded Richards, who was still flat on his back on the grass.

The first ever red card in World Cup rugby was issued for the infringement of pissing Buck Shelford off.
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Old 27th October 2011, 17:50     #14
Savage
 
Ahahaha, that's awesome :P

I really must do some more reading to further my knowledge of Buck - guy sounds like a living legend.
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Old 27th October 2011, 17:59     #15
doppelgänger of someone
 
I want to see that scrotum splitting match. As a study of character of course, not as a Halloween (heathen/pagan) celebration.
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Old 27th October 2011, 18:09     #16
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage
Ahahaha, that's awesome :P

I really must do some more reading to further my knowledge of Buck - guy sounds like a living legend.
Vid of the 87 Wales incident:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rj839DQuMaI

Upon viewing it looks like Buck smashed Richards right in front of the ref.

I love the fact that the Welsh captain gets in Buck's face afterwards and Buck seems to say "he was punching one of my boys so I smashed'im bro," and the big Welshman steps away as if convinced by the power of Buck's argument
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Old 27th October 2011, 18:12     #17
Luse
 
Edit: Must read whole thread before linking to video!


hahaha YESSS

Oi, don't hit my mate... BOOM

Last edited by Luse : 27th October 2011 at 18:14.
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Old 27th October 2011, 19:46     #18
Savage
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ab
Vid of the 87 Wales incident:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rj839DQuMaI

Upon viewing it looks like Buck smashed Richards right in front of the ref.

I love the fact that the Welsh captain gets in Buck's face afterwards and Buck seems to say "he was punching one of my boys so I smashed'im bro," and the big Welshman steps away as if convinced by the power of Buck's argument
lol I just got home and searched for that vid - came here to post it but you beat me to it! That was goddamn beautiful. Any ideas who the other AB is (looks like number 6?) who comes in with fists flying after that Welsh number 1 goes for Buck when he laid Huw Richards out?

Yeah that Welsh captain was no small fulla either! Haha, I feel like I've missed so much legendary history from the AB's.
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Old 27th October 2011, 19:51     #19
Savage
 
Oh god ... so this is why Buck had to step in and take a hand :P
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Old 27th October 2011, 19:52     #20
BoyWonder
 
I love the trainer's technique - The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you!
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Old 27th October 2011, 21:29     #21
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage
Oh god ... so this is why Buck had to step in and take a hand :P
Oh yes. The Haka pre-Buck is just embarrassing to watch. Seeing Alex Wylie flailing his hands about makes him look like a limp wristed pooftah. Not that I'd say that to his face though.
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Old 27th October 2011, 21:51     #22
TnT
 
Oh that was cringey.
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Old 27th October 2011, 22:01     #23
Nothing
 
I remember seeing a vid at some point about NZ's previous rugby legends and their refusal to leave the field of play despite being injured. The theme of the vid was something like "but he played on!" Apparently this is somewhat of a tradition in NZ rugby. Clearly I'll never be a rugby player, but I have bottomless respect for those boys.
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Old 28th October 2011, 00:27     #24
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
The concept of "substitutions" was only introduced to rugby in 1969. Up until then if you were too injured to play your team was down to 14 men. Rugby players who grew up before the seventies basically had it ingrained in them that leaving the field for any reason was letting the team down, because there was no such thing as a replacement. Even after 1969 you could only come off the field because of injury - none of this tactical substitution faggotry where a player can be subbed off if he's having a bad day or if the coach wants some fresh legs out there in the second half. That only became legal in 1996.
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Old 28th October 2011, 00:39     #25
doppelgänger of someone
 
Isn't that around the time the sport became professional? In the past it was for pride and glory. Now it is a lot more like a job, with health and safety etc. to worry about just like any other jobs.

re: Buck and that Welsh dude, it was the dude who threw the first punch, THAT'S why he was sent off. Nowadays for retaliation Buck probably would have been sent off as well.
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Old 28th October 2011, 00:51     #26
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by doppelgänger of someone
re: Buck and that Welsh dude, it was the dude who threw the first punch, THAT'S why he was sent off.
Fuck, REALLY? So when Ab said that the Welsh guy was sent off for pissing off Buck, that Ab was just, like... being funny? Man, I'm glad you're around to explain this stuff!
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Old 28th October 2011, 01:17     #27
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage
Any ideas who the other AB is (looks like number 6?) who comes in with fists flying after that Welsh number 1 goes for Buck when he laid Huw Richards out?
Alan Whetton. His brother Gary is the guy Richards is bashing at the start of the melee.
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Old 28th October 2011, 03:03     #28
doppelgänger of someone
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by CCS
Fuck, REALLY? So when Ab said that the Welsh guy was sent off for pissing off Buck, that Ab was just, like... being funny? Man, I'm glad you're around to explain this stuff!
What I'm bring to the table is that rugby authorities wouldn't condone or encourage playing through injury/causing injuries to others nowadays, probably because of professionalism. Is professionalism a good thing or bad? I don't know.

So what are YOU bringing to the table? For a change, how about from the non-vapid, non-rabid side of you that has been hiding SO WELL from us?
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Old 28th October 2011, 05:23     #29
Deadmeat
 
Look up 7 posts?
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Old 28th October 2011, 08:50     #30
Juju
get to da choppa
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ab
Here's another one of the legends: at RWC1987 there was a bit of biff in the NZ-Wales semifinal. Buck flattened Welsh lock Huw Richards with a strong punch, right in front of the touch judge. Oh shit. The touch judge conferred with the ref, NZ held its breath, and the ref went to his pocket. And red-carded Richards, who was still flat on his back on the grass.

The first ever red card in World Cup rugby was issued for the infringement of pissing Buck Shelford off.

I hate to be pedantic, actually who am I kidding, but they didn't have the carding system in 1987.
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Old 28th October 2011, 09:11     #31
blur^
 
hahah yep, from the vid it was just a finger, get the hell outa here boy
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Old 28th October 2011, 11:17     #32
CCS
Stunt Pants
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by doppelgänger of someone
What I'm bring to the table is that rugby authorities wouldn't condone or encourage playing through injury/causing injuries to others nowadays
Really? Is that right? Mate, you're an absolute rugby primer for Somalians who've never heard of rugby before!


Quote:
probably because of professionalism.
Yeah probably eh!


Quote:
Is professionalism a good thing or bad? I don't know.
Of course you don't. You're an imbecile.


Quote:
So what are YOU bringing to the table? For a change, how about from the non-vapid, non-rabid side of you that has been hiding SO WELL from us?
What I do is I make it nice and clear to everyone else how much of an imbecile you are.
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Old 28th October 2011, 11:37     #33
_Incubus_
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ab
(spun off from the RWC Final thread, getting distracting)

I'm old enough to remember the Battle of Nantes in 86. That was some fucking brutal shit.

Buck Shelford got punched in the face by some French cunt and had a bunch of teeth knocked out. Then some other French cunt went tapdancing on Buck's groin in rugby boots, ripping open his scrotum and leaving one of his nuts dangling out. So Buck got stretchered off and taken straight to hospital.

LIKE FUCK HE DID.

Buck walked to the sideline during play and got the team physio to stitch up his scrotum with a needle and thread while Buck held his testis in with his hands, gritting his gums against the pain because he'd just had his teeth knocked out. Once the work was done downstairs Buck had his mouth packed with bandages and he ran back out on to the field to continue play and smash some French motherfuckers in front of the 3 or 4 fans in attendance who hadn't fainted at what they'd just witnessed.

Later in the game some other French cunt punched/kneed (I forget) Buck in the head and knocked him out cold to stop him fucking their shit up.

French rugby at its finest. But its how Buck took it that people remember from that day.
Any one got a copy of that game?
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Old 28th October 2011, 12:14     #34
Pimp-X
Drunken Annoying
Superhero Bastard
 
Yes, I remember that epic display of steely determination and sheer fucking awesome. Don't fuck with Buck.

Makes Q. Cooper's pulling of a cunt muscle and having a liedown before even getting to the line look pretty faggy. How say you, savages?
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Old 28th October 2011, 12:50     #35
Lightspeed
 
Should be Buck up for the knighthood TBH.
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Old 28th October 2011, 13:06     #36
Saladin
Nothing to See Here!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage
Oh god ... so this is why Buck had to step in and take a hand :P
1987 Final version. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61JrDc3hIos

Still a bit lame, can see Buck's into it though!

Just 2 years later after Buck took the captaincy.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fg4FyhZ-Kg
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Old 28th October 2011, 13:19     #37
Ab
A mariachi ogre snorkel
 
The 80s were a million years ago, culturally. To be proud of Maori culture and show it was an almost revolutionary act. It's hard to imagine, now, but back then it wasn't the lame whiteboy haka that was embarrassing; it was showing that you gave a shit about Maori culture that was embarrassing.

New Zealand has grown up a lot since then. And Buck is one of the guys who dragged the NZ public towards enlightenment.

You gonna argue with Buck?
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Old 28th October 2011, 13:23     #38
Pepsi
Konnichiwa, bitches
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ab
(spun off from the RWC Final thread, getting distracting)

I'm old enough to remember the Battle of Nantes in 86. That was some fucking brutal shit.

Buck Shelford got punched in the face by some French cunt and had a bunch of teeth knocked out. Then some other French cunt went tapdancing on Buck's groin in rugby boots, ripping open his scrotum and leaving one of his nuts dangling out. So Buck got stretchered off and taken straight to hospital.

LIKE FUCK HE DID.

Buck walked to the sideline during play and got the team physio to stitch up his scrotum with a needle and thread while Buck held his testis in with his hands, gritting his gums against the pain because he'd just had his teeth knocked out. Once the work was done downstairs Buck had his mouth packed with bandages and he ran back out on to the field to continue play and smash some French motherfuckers in front of the 3 or 4 fans in attendance who hadn't fainted at what they'd just witnessed.

Later in the game some other French cunt punched/kneed (I forget) Buck in the head and knocked him out cold to stop him fucking their shit up.

French rugby at its finest. But its how Buck took it that people remember from that day.
Love that story, and enjoyed the way you told it more than how I had read it previously. A++ would read again.
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Old 28th October 2011, 13:35     #39
Juju
get to da choppa
 
I'm sure after the Wales standoff incident I learnt that the All Blacks didn't stand down from the haka until the other team did - yet throughout the cup I noticed the All blacks were the first to turn their backs after the haka. Am I remembering wrong or did the IRB muscle in to avoid a repeat?
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Old 28th October 2011, 13:39     #40
BoyWonder
 
I noticed that too and figured it was the AB's taking away the opportunity to make it a spectacle. Either that or they were under pressure to break for ads...
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